REPORTER: So, you are Jedi Master Luke Skywalker, correct?
SKYWALKER: Correct. What's this interview about, anyways?
REPORTER: Well, I have reason to suspect that you weren't always the noble, respected war hero that you are today.
SKYWALKER: Actually, that's quite obvi--
REPORTER: Don't interupt! I'm the one doing the interview!
SKYWALKER: *sigh* Alri--
REPORTER: Shush. Now, I have found some incriminating pictures.
SKYWALKER: I find that impossible! I've never done anything illegal or immoral!
REPORTER: I see you don't believe me... Well! I shall bring on the first picture!
SKYWALKER: *silent for a long time* Where did you get that?
REPORTER: It doesn't matter where I got it! It matters that you gave a creature of unknown origin a hideous haircut!
SKYWALKER: What?! He was like that when I found him!
REPORTER: So you stole him...
SKYWALKER: NO!
REPORTER: A likely story, I'm sure... NOW! Onto the next picture!
SKYWALKER: I fail to see what I'm doing wrong in that picture...
REPORTER: For one thing, you're signing your life away, and for another, your tie does NOT match you shirt!
SKYWALKER: *says nothing*
REPORTER: Aaaaaaalll right then..... moving on...
We both know you're not a lifeguard...
SKYWALKER: Look, is this going anywhere? Or are you just taking simple pictures and trying to prove me insane?
REPORTER: Pretty much the second thing...
SKYWALKER: La, la, la! I'm not listening to any more questions!
REPORTER: You know, that's not very ma--
SKYWALKER: *suddenly goes quiet and smiles*
REPORTER: Umm... I don't really like the way you're looking at me...
SKYWALKER: *makes face, then begins jumping over the reporter*
REPORTER: What are you doing?!?!
SKYWALKER: Giving you material.
REPORTER: Wait, wait, wait... You're giving ME material? For an article about your insanity?!
SKYWAKLER: *leans in closer* Between you and me... I need to ruin my reputation as a Jedi Master...
REPORTER: What? Why?
SKYWALKER: I wanna be a muppet.
*Recording ends*
"Well, there you have it! Jedi Master Luke Skywalker's finally cracked! You heard it here first!"
